On the birth of Kinkology - pt. 1.

Someone at a recent munch called me a one-stop shop for all things related to kink, healing, and development. That’s what I aimed to be, that’s why I’ve been investing so much into my training and education for over a decade - and I haven’t stopped, I consider it a constant work in progress.

I created Kinkology because there was no(t enough) place for people who experienced what I have, and who resonate with unconventional ways, walk unusual paths.

I know how it is to be considered too kinky for therapists, too traumatized for coaches, too "demi-"/emotional for Doms, too analytical for somatic spaces, too sensitive for the scene…

Too deep, too queer, too complex, too much, too weird, too something…

Sound familiar?

Some of my clients say things like:

"I’ve never been able to bring all of myself anywhere before."

"It feels like parts of me have been living separate lives."

"Finally someone gets the kink in my trauma and the trauma in my kink."

Kinkology is where it all converges.

Here where we can bring your kink into your healing. Your healing into your power.

Your power into your play. And your play into your becoming.

This isn’t just about BDSM. It’s about belonging.

To your body, to your weirdness, to your rhythm...

To the parts of you you’ve disowned because they didn’t fit what “healing” or “sex” or “strength” was supposed to look like.

One of the lies we’re sold is that healing looks like yoga mats and beige interiors. That empowerment is hustle and detachment. That BDSM is just roleplay. That therapy is just talking. That desire is something to manage.

Nah. You are not here to manage/control yourself. You are here to meet yourself.

And that takes precision, permission, sometimes just the right amount of attuned pressure, sometimes surrender... always presence.

This blog will go beyond a standard advice column, surpass surface-level tips and sanitized sexuality. I’ll share thought flows / musings / reflections / revelations, frameworks, behind-the-scenes of Kinkology sessions (only client-consented + anonymized, of course), and more...

If you’ve ever felt like no existing modality truly held you...

If you’ve had to piece your own healing together from scraps...

If you’ve secretly known that your desires are smarter than your diagnoses...

Then this space is for you.

You’re not broken. You’re just unmatched.

Let’s build a space that can match you.

👁‍🗨The Kinkologist

P.S. Want a post on a specific topic? Drop it in a message! :)